[AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

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[AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by Max14354 » Fri Apr 01, 2016 02:57

Chapter 1 - Settling In

Chapter 2 - A Royal Visit



So, Westeros is a dangerous place, only the smartest and the bravest survive in the Game of Thrones, but is it really that dangerous?

We are going to find out. There are a lot of AARs around featuring god like characters doing god like things like conquering the world, its nice but i got bored from all that
greatness and stuff, so, we are going to see how long a semi-retarded player controling a lame character can survive in the dreaded Game of Thrones,

I present to you the great Mark Stonecrab!

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Creating a new character can be pretty boring but luckly there is a random button right there, what could go wrong? Apparently his face could...

Ok... Next! Lets create our banner... Since his name is Stonecrab (also random) im guessing there should be something similar to a crab painted on my shield, otherwise some
people might get really confused in tournaments.

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After some 200 clicks i finally find a crab, or at least what I hope its a crab.

Now lets move on to traits. I dont want to play an all powerful lord but I also dont wanna be a Hodor so i have no idea what traits I should pick. As Mark Stonecrabb used to
say: "When in doubt just give up and go do something fun", Ill just give him a chance of being a complete idiot or a good guy, leaving him with no traits at all.

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Im getting kinda bored so lets speed things up a little, I just have to choose where Mark is going to live, Westeros is huge and the possibilities are infinite, after some time clicking around I decide to settle with something familiar. Standfast! Some will know that Standfast is barely more than a tower with a couple of villages around,
but they forget that it is so much more, it also has chickens!

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Welcome to my humble aboad. With extra humble and chickens. I spend my first day as a lord kicking some Osgreys out of my castle and feeding them to the chickens, this is my
tower now!

Now that the Osgrey dynasty is extinct I can finaly begin to enjoy life as a Stonecrabb. I wonder how much time sweet Mark will survive in Westeros. So far so good.

Time to start doing lordly stuff, get a wife, appoint my counsil, have dinner and such.

I was checking on Craigslist for suitable spouses and it has some pretty famous names in it including Daenerys Stormborn, The Unburnt, Rightful Queen of the Andals the Rhoynar
and the First Men etc. It would be a pretty sweet choice were not for the fact that she is a newborn baby. I started at the Crowned Stag, so she must be just a few days old and
I dont feel like waiting 20 years to start having children. Sorry Dany.

Eventualy I settle with a Hightower girl, apparently the Hightowers think that having their Leyla marry me is a good idea, Im not sure why.

I actually have a pretty decent counsil.

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Time to get this marriage going, her father gives me some 50 gold to help with the costs and I immeadtly spend it on mercenaries. Now that Ive got the whole marriage thing covered,
its time to start plotting against my liege and taking over the Northmarch. It might take a while since my better stat is a 11 martial...

And it looks that 11 is enought to get my lieges atention, he soon offers me a command.

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Great... Now even my 14yo wife is a better fighter than I am...

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Not anymore, now I am just as good as that little girl. Yay!

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Soon after that I get my first important decision, looks like some noble guy did something wrong and I have to decide his fate. I can either release him and get a favour or I
can imprison him and get some prestige. I usually pick the prestige but im needing some new courtiers in my chicken tower.

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Now i have another useless mouth to feed, a mouth called Rickard Farrow. I just hope I dont run out of chickens.

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Damn, Renly is already a pain in stannis's arse, and hes not even 7 yet. Looks like my game is gonna keep close to canon.

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Wow, my wife is already pregnant, im pretty good at this.

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And here he is, my first son.

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Sitting around with my chickens is getting pretty boring, nothing interesting is happening... I guess Ill just be educating my son while I wait for chaos to arrive.

Speaking of the devil... Tyrion was the first to perish in the Game of Thrones. He was murdered at the age of 11. Guess Tysha will have to find some other dwarf to marry.

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Now we are talking! Doran just decided to kick some Lannister ass! Lets watch a different version of the Viper vs the Mountain. With a little less bashed brains this time...

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News just in from far far away, a new Lord Commander has been elected at the Wall. Im not sure if they picked the right person for the job but who am I to talk?
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Hey, looks like we are going to get our first set of executions... My wife decided to get pregnant with some idiots baby! Im the only idiot allowed to get her pregnant!
After a quick check I confirm that my first son is indeed mine so he will be allowed to live on. As for my wife...

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The guy fled to Dragonstone, my wife was not so lucky...

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After a quick trial my wife is proven guilty. The main evidence was the fact that her belly just kept getting bigger
and it surely wasnt just farts. I cant actually execute her without angering both my son and the Hightowers so I decide that she could just live the rest of her life as a
silent sister. Sweet sweet mercy.

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Time to pick a new wife, this time i choose the daughter of some baron somewhere in the Reach. Best of luck to you, Wife Number Two!

Oh I had totally forgoten about the whole Doran vs Tywin thing!
Looks like Doran isnt doing so great...

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Nope, not great at all...

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Maybe he could ask for a trial by combat, im sure Oberyn wouldnt mess everything up this time.

Hey! My traits are getting pretty great.

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Wow, even Cersei's uterus can find a way to mess everything up. She just gave birth to an ancient being sixty thousand years old! And then he died!

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Hoster Tully got Rekd.

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So, after a few months lying aroud in Standfast I get two great news, first, my new wife is pregnant, second, I just got a claim to Dosk! In your face Duncan Durwell! Next stop
Dosk!

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I hire some 500 mercenary knights and head to war, All Aboard!

I have a pretty good advantage but still... Im worried I might loose this thing... Well, looks like some Durwels forgot to assign people to lead their troops, I win by an amazing lead.
Well, let me walk you through what happened. After winnig in the field I quickly take Bulls Keep, his castle, and a few hours after I kick him out of his own keep i receive a
offer from my liege to take Duncans position as a master of arms. Looks like the future of house Stonecrabb is pretty great.

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This is me as of right now.
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Cersei's new baby is not a old man this time but its also not an alive baby...

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Daughter is born.
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Im now brave for some reason. Looks like stealing castles builds character.

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Doran is still imprisoned by Tywin... The Red Viper doesnt seem to give a shit.

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After a few days traveling between my two castles I receive some worrying news:
My septon has been murdered by an angry mob while doing charity work in Standfast.
That is amazing! I didnt even know that i owned an entire mob! Unless...
The Chickens!!

Day 17: Im still too scared to set foot outside my tower. The chickens are still pretending to be dumb and nice. And dumb. They are not fooling me like how they did with whats his face. (septon)


Will Mark ever be free again? Is Oberyn ever gonna realise that Doran has been gone for quite some time now? What about my family? I totally forgot about them.
Get the awnsers and more on my next entry. This is Mark Stonecrabb signing off.
Last edited by Max14354 on Sat Apr 02, 2016 22:12, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by derrae » Fri Apr 01, 2016 20:44

Best AAR I've ever read, 10/10
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by EDAP » Fri Apr 01, 2016 21:42

Yeah, I buy this. Mark for King, 8k290ish
Here is a link to my personal list of FAQs. Please check there to see if it answers you question. This is still largely up to date, and I will try and remember to update it when I find the time.
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by Widowmaker94 » Fri Apr 01, 2016 22:06

MORE MORE MORE!!!!!!
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by Max14354 » Sat Apr 02, 2016 19:53

Working on chapter 2
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by Max14354 » Sat Apr 02, 2016 22:09

Chapter 2 - A Royal Visit

Let me paint you a word picture.
A new day dawns, the sun shines high in the sky, lords and ladies across the realm wake up and admire all that they have and crave for what they dont. Commoners are already working
in the fields, for they cant afford to wake up with the sun, to survive they have to work hard and fight for every bit of food. In the middle of all the politic, intrigue, working
and betrayal a lonely tower stands on top of a hill, silently gazing the horizon that remais infinite for hundreds of miles, yet conceals so much of the world. In that tower,
a young man still in his twenties, yet already demonstrating signs of massive hair loss, rises from his bed, ready for a second chapter.

Its show time.

Mark came a long way since the day when he first came into existence, ten years before. He doesnt remember much of his first days in the world, there was something about exiling a bunch of Osgreys
but the memories fade away just when he tries to remember them. On his first days, he was hollow, nothing but a shell with no personality, a dutiful commander shell.
Now, mark is a honest to god knight. Despite not being a master he knows his ways with a sword and is not afraid to use it, despite sometimes making rash decisions Mark
is a pretty nice guy and would have a lot of friends if he didnt live in a isolated tower in the middle of nowhere.

That is not entirely true, Coldmoat is just a short ride away and he did steal a small castle to the northeast that now lies abandoned, if he kept riding he would eventually
reach the Rowan's lands, and...

Wait, there is someone knocking on the door...

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Who would have guessed it! Viserys Targaryen! What brings him to my tiny little tower in the middle of a kingdom where he is hunted? Who knows? He is craaazy.

He's actually a nice guy once you get to know him better. He gives me a short speech about how he is my righful king and how i should do anything he says.
I ask him if he came to take his righful place at the Iron Throne.
He says no. He was just traveling around, spotted my tower and decided to settle. He also mentions that, on his way up, he stopped by the kitchen and ate some bread and salt,
so now I was obligated to provide shelter and protection to him and his sister for all of eternity.
I was pretty sure thats not how it works but I decided to not argue with him, he looked very unstable.
So, I decided to comply with his demands and offered him residence at Dosk.
On his way out he also mentioned something about having tons of spys and assassins following him around and something about an spider...
Im pretty sure that he is just speaking crazy.
Looks like I have a special guest for the next few years...

A few days later those spys and assassins decide to show up. Some fifty men with stags painted on their shields arrive and arrest prince Viserys and take him away in a heart beat. I was about to let them take him and take care of my life but im reminded that Mark is both Brave, Honorable and Wroth. Damn you Mark! Why couldnt you be more
like Hodor?

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I get on my horse and I go after them in a stupid rescue mission. Mark vs 50 guys. I might be playing as my son from now on...
After a short ride I can see the small retinue on the road leading to Goldengrove, but something is wrong, they are all trying to kill eachother, they are not suposed to
do that right?

Its takes me a minute to realise that the king's men are being attacked by a much larger band of men with a trout on their shields.

The fighting is over before I can reach them, at first the attackers thought that I was with them but Viserys interfered and vouched for me, speaking of how I provided him
with shelter and food for the past few days.
Now that the danger had been dealt with, their leader falls dawn to one knee and pledges loyalty and obedience to Viserys, his King. Viserys tells him to rise up and asks
for his saviour's identity.
"I have the honour of being Lord Edmure Tully, your grace, Lord of Riverrun."

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- It must be nice, it must be nice, to have a Tully on your side -

Whaat? Are we going to start a rebellion and sit a Targaryen in the Iron Throne, once again? Is Mark going to rise above his station and become one of the most powerful people in Westeros? Probably not.
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by TheOneNation » Wed Aug 31, 2016 18:54

This is brilliant, mate. Please continue the story at some point!
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Re: [AAR] A NEW ULTIMATE STONECRAB STORY PART 1/1000

PostPosted by Max14354 » Wed Aug 31, 2016 23:58

TheOneNation wrote:This is brilliant, mate. Please continue the story at some point!


Lost the save and lost my interest, so thats not happening.
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